Jennifer Lopez Innocent Pictures


Jennifer Lopez Innocent Pictures

Jennifer Lopez Physical Description

Jennifer Lopez Height and Weight

Jennifer Lopez Height : 5' 6" (1.68 m)

Jennifer Lopez Weight : 125 lbs.

Jennifer Lopez sure has a great figure. What a body !!!! She was born lucky having such a great figure.

Jennifer Lopez Beach Photos Wearing Black Outfit


Jennifer Lopez Beach Photos Wearing Black Outfit

Jennifer Lopez Height : 5' 6" (1.68 m)

Jennifer Lopez Weight : 125 lbs.

Jennifer Lopez jumping In The Air Pictures

Jennifer Lopez jumping In The Air Pictures

Jennifer Lopez Jumping Pictures

Jennifer Lopez Height : 5' 6" (1.68 m)

Jennifer Lopez Weight : 125 lbs.

Jennifer Beautifully Sitting Pictures


Jennifer Beautifully Sitting Pictures

Jennifer Lopez Date of Birth, Jennifer Lopez DOB : 24 July 1969, The Bronx, New York, USA.

Jennifer Lopez Birth Name: Jennifer Lynn Lopez

Jennifer Lopez Nickname : J.Lo,La Lopez,Lola,Jenny From The Block

Jennifer Lopez Height : 5' 6" (1.68 m)

Jennifer Lopez Salary


Jennifer Lopez

Jennifer Lopez Salary

Monster-in-Law (2005) $15,000,000
Shall We Dance (2004) $14,000,000
Jersey Girl (2004) $4,000,000
Gigli (2003) $12,000,000
Maid in Manhattan (2002) $12,000,000
Angel Eyes (2001) $9,000,000
The Wedding Planner (2001) $9,000,000
The Cell (2000) $4,000,000
Antz (1998) $500,000
Out of Sight (1998) $2,000,000
U Turn (1997) $1,000,000
Anaconda (1997) $1,000,000
Selena (1997) $1,000,000
Blood and Wine (1996) $250,000
Jack (1996) $200,000
Money Train (1995) $200,000
My Family (1995) $50,000

Jennifer Lopez Twitter

Jennifer Lopez Twitter

http://twitter.com/jlo

Jennifer Lopez latest tweets

Just a reminder for you lovers that Haiti still needs our help. Do whatever you can even if it’s sending them your prayers. God bless!

Jennifer Lopez - Waiting For Tonight Lyrics

Jennifer Lopez - Waiting For Tonight Lyrics

Like a movie scene
In the sweetest dreams
I have pictured us together
Now to feel your lips
On my fingertips
I have to say is even better
Then I ever thought it could possibly be
It's perfect, it's passion, it's setting me free
From all of my sadness
The tears that I've cried
I have spent all of my life

CHORUS:
Waiting for tonight, oh
When you would be here in my arms
Waiting for tonight, oh
I've dreamed of this love for so long
Waiting for tonight

Tender words you say
Take my breath away
Love me now, leave me never
Found a sacred place
Lost in your embrace
I want to stay in this forever
I think of the days when the sun used to set
On my empty heart, all alone in my bed
Tossing and turning
Emotions were strong
I knew I had to hold on

CHORUS (2x)

Gone are the days when the sun used to set
On my empty heart all alone in my bed
Tossing and turning
Emotions were strong
I knew I had to hold on

CHORUS (3x)

Waiting for tonight, Oh

Jennifer Lopez Struggles


Jennifer Lopez Struggles

Jennifer Lopez Admits Struggle With Losing Baby Weight

Jennifer Lopez admits it was an "uphill struggle" to lose her baby weight. The singer-and-actress - who gave birth to twins Max and Emme in February 2008 - gained 50lbs when she was pregnant and was shocked when it didn't fall off straight away.

She said: "I thought the weight was going to drop off easily because I'd been in shape my whole life. But it wasn't easy. It was an uphill struggle. I had gained about 50lbs while pregnant. The first 30lb dropped off like that and I was so pleased.

Then I had to lose the last 15 or 20lbs that just didn't want to go. I had to diet and work out a lot." (Courtesy: icelebz.com)

Jennifer Lopez Childhood Pictures


Jennifer Lopez Childhood Pictures

Jennifer Lopez Childhood Picture

Jennifer Lopez Physical Description

Jennifer Lopez Height and Weight

Jennifer Lopez Height : 5' 6" (1.68 m)

Jennifer Lopez Weight : 125 lbs.

Jennifer Lopez sure has a great figure. What a body !!!! She was born lucky having such a great figure.

What was Jennifer Lopez childhood like


What was Jennifer Lopez childhood like

Jennifer Lopez (born 24.7.1969)

Jennifer Lopez (also known as J.Lo) is an American singer, actress and record producer.

Jennifer Lopez Childhood

Jennifer Lopez was born and raised in the Bronx area of New York City. Her parents, Guadalupe Rodriguez and David Lopez were of Puerto Rican descent and she was raised as a Catholic, attending Catholic schools such as Preston High School.

At the age of 19, Jennifer Lopez began to pay for her own dancing lessons and vocal coaching and eventually started dancing in Manhattan nightclubs, whilst also working in a legal office. She auditioned for a number of dancing roles, including rap music videos, working as a dancer for New Kids on the Block and an episode of Yo! MTV Raps. In 1993, Lopez appeared as a dancer in Janet Jackson's 'That's The Way Love Goes' and secured work as her regular backing dancer. (Courtesy: contactmusic.com)

Jennifer Lopez holding white Cup in her hand Pictures


Jennifer Lopez holding white Cup in her hand Pictures

Jennifer Lopez is wearing black specs with big nice ear rings.

Jennifer Lopez Height : 5' 6" (1.68 m)

Jennifer Lopez Weight : 125 lbs.

Jennifer Lopez Date of Birth (Jennifer Lopez DOB) : 24 July 1969, The Bronx, New York, USA.

Jennifer Lopez Birth Name : Jennifer Lynn Lopez

Jennifer Lopez Nickname : J.Lo, La Lopez, Lola, Jenny From The Block.

Jennifer Lopez Perfume - Jennifer Lopez Fragrances


Jennifer Lopez Perfume - Jennifer Lopez Fragrances

Jennifer Lopez ventured in the perfume industry with her debut "Glow by J.Lo". In October 2003, Lopez introduced a perfume called "Still", having revisit "Glow" the previous year by creating a limited edition spin-off, "Miami Glow by J.Lo", in homage to her adopted hometown of Miami. Lopez also marketed a "Glow" line of body lotions and bronzing products. For the Christmas season of 2005, she launched another fragrance, "Live by Jennifer Lopez". For 2006 Valentine's Day, "Miami Glow" was replaced by yet another "Glow" spin-off, "Love at First Glow by J.Lo". Her following fragrance, "Live Luxe", was released in August 2006, with "Glow After Dark" following in January 2007. The next fragrances by Jennifer Lopez were "Deseo", "Deseo Forever" for Asian market and first fragrance for men called "Deseo for men". In February 2009 Lopez released "Sunkissed Glow". The last perfume is "My Glow", available from October 2009.[43] Lopez is a spokesperson for Lux shampoo in Japan, appearing in the product's television commercials. (Courtesy: wikipedia)

Jennifer Lopez Height : 5' 6" (1.68 m)

Jennifer Lopez Weight : 125 lbs.

Jennifer Lopez Date of Birth (Jennifer Lopez DOB) : 24 July 1969, The Bronx, New York, USA

Jennifer Lopez Birth Name : Jennifer Lynn Lopez

Jennifer Lopez Nickname : J.Lo, La Lopez, Lola, Jenny From The Block.

Jennifer Lopez and husband Marc Anthony Photos of twin

Jennifer Lopez and husband Marc Anthony Photos of twin

Jennifer Lopez and husband Marc Anthony with their twin kids

Jennifer Lopez Height : 5' 6" (1.68 m)

Jennifer Lopez Weight : 125 lbs.

Jennifer Lopez Date of Birth (Jennifer Lopez DOB) : 24 July 1969, The Bronx, New York, USA

Jennifer Lopez Birth Name : Jennifer Lynn Lopez

Jennifer Lopez Nickname : J.Lo, La Lopez, Lola, Jenny From The Block.

Jennifer Lopez Red Outfit In the Car Pictures


Jennifer Lopez Red Outfit In the Car Pictures

Jennifer Lopez Height : 5' 6" (1.68 m)

Jennifer Lopez Weight : 125 lbs.

Jennifer Lopez Date of Birth (Jennifer Lopez DOB) : 24 July 1969, The Bronx, New York, USA

Jennifer Lopez Birth Name : Jennifer Lynn Lopez

Jennifer Lopez Nickname : J.Lo, La Lopez, Lola, Jenny From The Block.

Jennifer Lopez Touching The Ground Pictures


Jennifer Lopez Touching The Ground Pictures

Jennifer Lopez is sitting down / bending and touching ground.

Jennifer Lopez Height : 5' 6" (1.68 m)

Jennifer Lopez Weight : 125 lbs.

Jennifer Lopez Date of Birth (Jennifer Lopez DOB) : 24 July 1969, The Bronx, New York, USA

Jennifer Lopez Birth Name : Jennifer Lynn Lopez

Jennifer Lopez Nickname : J.Lo, La Lopez, Lola, Jenny From The Block.

Jennifer Lopez Cool Pictures


Jennifer Lopez Pictures

Jennifer Lopez holding white suff in her hand.

Jennifer Lopez is holing white stuff in her hand. I don't know what is this? It's not banana. Is it eatable? It can not be Microphone (Mic).

Jennifer Lopez Height : 5' 6" (1.68 m)

Jennifer Lopez Weight : 125 lbs.

Jennifer Lopez Date of Birth (Jennifer Lopez DOB) : 24 July 1969, The Bronx, New York, USA

Jennifer Lopez Birth Name : Jennifer Lynn Lopez

Jennifer Lopez Nickname : J.Lo, La Lopez, Lola, Jenny From The Block.

Jennifer Lopez sure has a great figure. What a body !!!! She was born lucky having such a great figure.

Jennifer Lopez Beautiful Pictures


Jennifer Lopez Beautiful Pictures

Jennifer Lopez is beautiful indeed. Jennifer Lopez is stunning.

Jennifer Lopez is awesomne.

Jennifer Lopez Height : 5' 6" (1.68 m)

Jennifer Lopez Weight : 125 lbs.

Jennifer Lopez Date of Birth (Jennifer Lopez DOB) : 24 July 1969, The Bronx, New York, USA

Jennifer Lopez Birth Name : Jennifer Lynn Lopez

Jennifer Lopez Nickname : J.Lo, La Lopez, Lola, Jenny From The Block.

Jennifer Lopez Pregnant Pictures


Jennifer Lopez Pregnant Pictures


Jennifer Lopez Pregnant Pictures

Jennifer Lopez still has a good figure with having her baby inside her womb. Most girls look ugly when they are pregnant but Jennifer Lopez is not. She looks hot, awesome, and stunning !!!!

Jennifer Lopez sure has a great figure. What a body !!!! She was born lucky having such a great figure.

Jennifer Lopez Height : 5' 6" (1.68 m)

Jennifer Lopez Date of Birth (Jennifer Lopez DOB) : 24 July 1969, The Bronx, New York, USA

Jennifer Lopez Birth Name : Jennifer Lynn Lopez

Jennifer Lopez Nickname : J.Lo, La Lopez, Lola, Jenny From The Block.

Jennifer Lopez In Black Pictures


Jennifer Lopez In Black Pictures

Jennifer Lopez In Black. Jennifer Lopez wearing Black. Her Nail Polish is blac, her Shoes is black, and even her eyeborw is black. Jennifer Lopez Black Outfit.

Jennifer Lopez Physical Description

Jennifer Lopez Height and Weight

Jennifer Lopez Height : 5' 6" (1.68 m)

Jennifer Lopez Weight : 125 lbs.

Jennifer Lopez Date of Birth (Jennifer Lopez DOB) : 24 July 1969, The Bronx, New York, USA

Jennifer Lopez Birth Name : Jennifer Lynn Lopez

Jennifer Lopez Nickname : J.Lo, La Lopez, Lola, Jenny From The Block.

Jennifer Lopez sure has a great figure. What a body !!!! She was born lucky having such a great figure.

Jennifer Lopez Pictures


Jennifer Lopez Pictures


Jennifer Lopez Pictures


Jennifer Lopez Pictures


Jennifer Lopez Height : 5' 6" (1.68 m)

Jennifer Lopez Weight : 125 lbs.

Jennifer Lopez sure has a great figure. What a body !!!! She was born lucky having such a great figure.

Jennifer Lopez Weight Loss


Jennifer Lopez

Jennifer Lopez Weight Loss

Jennifer Lopez after Weight Loss

Jennifer Lopez Weight Loss

Jennifer Lopez lost 40 lbs. after having twins

According to most reports - Jennifer Lopez

* Her 1400 calorie diet consisted mainly of fresh fruit, raw vegetables, she had protein at each meal, and she's always drinking water.

* She's avoiding all red meats until she reaches her goal weight of 120 pounds.

* Jennifer Lopez worked out for 45-to-75 minutes four times a week so.

-- nowloss.com

Jennifer Lopez Height : 5' 6" (1.68 m)

Jennifer Lopez Weight : 125 lbs.

Jennifer Lopez sure has a great figure. What a body !!!! She was born lucky having such a great figure.

Jennifer Lopez Pictures of twins - Jennifer Lopez Pictures of kids


Jennifer Lopez Pictures of kids


Jennifer Lopez Pictures of twins


Jennifer Lopez Height : 5' 6" (1.68 m)

Jennifer Lopez Weight : 125 lbs.

Jennifer Lopez Date of Birth (Jennifer Lopez DOB) : 24 July 1969, The Bronx, New York, USA

Jennifer Lopez Birth Name : Jennifer Lynn Lopez

Jennifer Lopez Nickname : J.Lo, La Lopez, Lola, Jenny From The Block.

Jennifer Lopez Physical Description





Jennifer Lopez Physical Description

Jennifer Lopez Height and Weight

Jennifer Lopez Height : 5' 6" (1.68 m)

Jennifer Lopez Weight : 125 lbs.

Jennifer Lopez sure has a great figure. What a body !!!! She was born lucky having such a great figure.

Jennifer Lopez Buttocks











Jennifer Lopez Buttocks

Jennifer Lopez Date of Birth (Jennifer Lopez DOB) : 24 July 1969, The Bronx, New York, USA

Jennifer Lopez Birth Name : Jennifer Lynn Lopez

Jennifer Lopez Nickname : J.Lo, La Lopez, Lola, Jenny From The Block,

Jennifer Lopez Height : 5' 6" (1.68 m)

Jennifer Lopez Movies List


Jennifer Lopez Movies List

Jennifer Lopez Filmography

2007 Bordertown
El Cantante

2005 An Unfinished Life
Monster-In-Law

2004 Shall We Dance
Jersey Girl

2003 Gigli

2002 Maid in Manhattan
Enough

2001 Angel Eyes
The Wedding Planner

2000 The Cell

1998 Antz
Out of Sight

1997 U-Turn
Anaconda
Selena

1996 Blood and Wine
Jack

1995 Money Train
My Family

1990 Lambada

1986 My Little Girl

Jennifer Lopez Beach Body


Jennifer Lopez Beach Body

Jennifer Lopez Height : 5' 6" (1.68 m)

Jennifer Lopez Date of Birth (Jennifer Lopez DOB) : 24 July 1969, The Bronx, New York, USA

Jennifer Lopez Birth Name : Jennifer Lynn Lopez

Jennifer Lopez Nickname : J.Lo, La Lopez, Lola, Jenny From The Block.


Jennifer Lopez sure has a great figure. What a body !!!! She was born lucky haiing such a great figure.

Jennifer Lopez Biography


Jennifer Lopez

Jennifer Lopez Biography - Jennifer Lopez Bio

Jennifer Lopez Physical Description

Jennifer Lopez Height and Weight

Jennifer Lopez Height : 5' 6" (1.68 m)

Jennifer Lopez Weight : 125 lbs.


Jennifer Lopez Date of Birth (Jennifer Lopez DOB) : 24 July 1969, The Bronx, New York, USA

Jennifer Lopez Birth Name : Jennifer Lynn Lopez

Jennifer Lopez Nickname : J.Lo, La Lopez, Lola, Jenny From The Block.

Jennifer Lopez sure has a great figure. What a body !!!! She was born lucky having such a great figure.

Jennifer Lopez Movies list

Jennifer Lopez Filmography

Jennifer Lopez Movies

Jennifer Lopez: Super Star Collection on DVD

Second Chances on DVD (1993)

Lost In The Wild on DVD (1993)

My Family (Mi Familia) on DVD (1995)

Money Train on DVD (1995)

Jack on DVD (1996)

U-Turn on DVD (1997)

Selena on DVD (1997)

Selena (10th Anniversary Two-Disc Special Edition) on DVD (1997)

Blood & Wine on DVD (1997)

Anaconda on DVD (1997)

Anaconda on Blu-ray (1997)

Out Of Sight (Special Edition) on DVD (1998)

Antz on DVD (1998)

The Cell on DVD (2000)

The Wedding Planner on DVD (2001)

Angel Eyes on DVD (2001)

Maid In Manhattan on DVD (2002)

Maid In Manhattan on Blu-ray (2002)

Fools Rush In (1997)/Maid In Manhattan on DVD (2002)

Enough on DVD (2002)

Enough (Special Edition) on DVD (2002)

Out Of Sight (1998)/Intolerable Cruelty on DVD (2003)

Michael Jackson: Number Ones on DVD (2003)

Jennifer Lopez: The Reel Me on DVD (2003)

Gigli on DVD (2003)

Will & Grace: Season Seven on DVD (2004)

Shall We Dance? on DVD (2004)

Shall We Dance? on Blu-ray (2004)

Shall We Dance? (Widescreen Version) on DVD (2004)

Jersey Girl on DVD (2004)

Monster-In-Law on DVD (2005)

An Unfinished Life on DVD (2005)

Bordertown on DVD (2006)

Manufacturing Dissent on DVD (2007)

El Cantante on DVD (2007)

RECORDING REDUX



















A lot of people wrote to me and said they particularly liked this cartoon, so I've put it on a T-shirt. If you want to display your wickedly sophisticated sense of humor and musical taste, order yours now.

Don't forget they also make great gifts for the musician or audiophile in your life!

I want to see the shirt now!!!

Sunny Sunday Punny










(To view this image more big, click on the left eyeball of the seventh clone getting out of the car.)

Bizarro is brought to you today by Freaky Science.

Here's another of my Sunday Punnies series, which is a collection of three puns mostly submitted by readers and friends. If you have an idea for a fun pun and would like to see it in Bizarro with no compensation whatsoever other than the fun of seeing your idea in print, send it to me. The puns need to be original in that you didn't see it in another comic or on the Internet or whatever. And you should be aware that most of the ideas people send are not accepted because I'm looking for something of a certain type and style that I find both unusual and interesting visually. If all that makes sense to you, submit away, what have you got to lose?

You can either send them to me in the comments section of one of my blog posts, or via email. My address is at Bizarro.com.

By the way, the comics that get credited are from close friends or colleagues as a special favor, in the past I have not been doing that for everyone. But my new policy will be give a small credit line – like the "w/Brandt" above – for anyone whose idea I use for a Sunday Punny. Weeeee!

Challenges of the Musically Challenged

Bizarro is brought to you today by Educational Literature.

I have a good friend back in Texas who has run a recording studio for decades. Every now and then he'll share some of the more "noteworthy" music that he has recorded for clients there and I often wonder how he survives. As we know from the popular TV show, "American Idol," (which I am proud to say I've never watched a moment of, the commercials are plenty) not everyone who thinks they can be a rock star has a single iota of talent.

For reasons unclear to me, I'm particularly sensitive to music. I literally cannot tolerate listening to music that I don't like. I become instantly irritable, my heart rate rises, my teeth turn into fangs and I am not satisfied until someone is dead. I don't mean to say that I'm a public *sshole about it, but I will quietly leave a store or restaurant if the music is offensive to me, whether I've finished my business there or not. This is perhaps the biggest reason I dislike the Xmas season so much, the offensive music is ubiquitous.

It wouldn't be such a curse if I liked most popular music, but I don't. I'm very picky. Any single song from any recording of such popular bands as Eagles, Steely Dan, Steve Miller Band, Abba, Billy Joel, Metallica, Rush, all hip hop (yes, I know that is a very general statement, but I can't stand 'rhyme talking' of any kind,) drives me over a cliff. And that's just a fraction of the bands I can't stand. I wish I wasn't this way, but there's nothing I can do about it.

That being said, I've been learning to play the guitar and have been writing songs and recording them on my computer. One day I'm going to record them in a "real" studio and sell a CD through my website and this blog. So I may be the guy behind the glass in the cartoon above soon enough (though it's a cinch my music will ever be popular enough to drive shoppers from stores.)

Until tomorrow, be well, earth travelers.

CONTEST UPDATE


The Mysterious anonymous winner of Contest #16 did, in fact, write back to me in the comments and successfully claim his/her submission. But he/she did not leave his/her email address once again, this time saying that because he/she (tired of this lack of an appropriate non-gender specific pronoun for this situation?) did not enter correctly, the prize should go to the second place winner.

Okay, that's fine but I just want to say that not leaving your email address does not disqualify you from winning. I'm happy to send you some cards. If you want to leave your email in the comments section, I'll write it down and delete the comment immediately. If you're not comfortable with it, no problem, I understand. I promise not to use your info against you, or even keep it on file if it worries you.

"Nuff said," as the sit-com characters say.

CONTEST #16 WINNERS!


Thanks to everyone who played our incredibly exciting Bizarro Puzzler Teaser Treasure Hunt Game Thing this week. We have our three winners, with a caveat.

1. First place goes to someone good at solving puzzles but not at reading instructions. It was submitted anonymously and had no email address. So who are you? Below, I have posted your winning list. If you can tell me what expletive you began your post with, then provide me with an email address, I'll send you your prize. Leave it in the comments section to any post, I'll see it when I moderate comments and not post your email address.

2. Second place goes to he who goes by "dcr". He's won second place before, and may win first place this week if I don't hear from our mysterious anonymous submitter.

3. Goes to Randy S. He, too, has won before too, taking top honors in contest #15.

A couple of submitters got in before any of you three, but neither had all 15 correct answers.
















Here's a new feature, click here if you want to see the 15 differences graphically circled. Cool.

CONTEST #16


















RULES, ETC:
As usual, two images are posted below, one is the original cartoon, the warped image beneath it has been changed in 15 ways. Your mission, if you are the disco royalty that I think you are, is to find those differences.

1. There are 15 differences between the two cartoons.
2. NONE of the differences have to do with the warped nature of the second image.
3. ALL of the differences are something missing, added, or moved, not just "bent" from the distortion. The differences will not be too subtle, so once you spot one you should be relatively certain you've found it. (As opposed to something like, "Is the hat on this one is a shade lighter than the other one? Hmmm.")
4. FIRST PERSON to correctly list the 15 differences in the comments section of the post wins 4 packs of Bizarro Trading Cards, mailed by me personally from Bizarro International Headquarters in Brooklyn. I'll even lick the stamp, unless it's self adhesive. SECOND AND THIRD persons with correct answers will each get 2 packs of Bizarro Trading Cards!
5. Put your email address on your comment so I can contact you if you win. I won't post it or keep it or file it or sell it or mount a Broadway musical about it.
6. If you live outside the U.S., I may not be able to send you a prize. Depends. Canada is probably fine, Saudia Arabia, probably not.

Click on the image below to ENLARGE and PLAY!

Notes on a Zebra

Bizarro is brought to you today by Betty's Secret.

I draw the vast majority of things in my cartoons from memory but now and then I like to get things especially right, which was the case with the zebras here. While researching pictures of zebras online for this cartoon, I was struck by how incredibly beautiful they are. You get used to looking at things all your life and tend to take them for granted, but I find that if I take a moment to step outside myself and imagine I'm seeing something for the first time, like many people before the invention of photography certainly did with animals like zebras, it is truly amazing. A white horse all covered with bold black stripes. It's like they were concieved by a talented gay designer. Unfortunately for the zebras, this has also led to a lot of arrogant disregard for their lives.

I feel this way about roosters, as well. We're so used to seeing them on cornflakes boxes that we forget what exotic birds they are. Roosters are among my favorite animals in the world. Here's another one.

A regular reader wrote to me this week and asked me if the face in the tail area was intentional. It was not, but I see something that looks a bit like a face so he's not totally crazy. Anybody else notice this or is LeRoy perhaps crazier than I think?

Come back later today for the contest. You will experience pleasure.

Contest TODAY!!


















Come back today at 7pm NYC (Eastern) Time to compete in this week's contest. First three people to solve the puzzle win BIZARRO TRADING CARDS!!! Yessssssss!

Here's one of the previous contests, to acquaint you with the process. Happy puzzling!

*"BIG" in this context, means small.

Belief

Bizarro is brought to you today by Other Bigfoot Disguises.

I have a few friends and acquaintances who believe in Bigfoot, Sasquatch, whatever you want to call it, so it's been on my mind lately and I've done more Bigfoot cartoons per calendar year than I normally would. Just for the record, I'm open minded but generally not a believer of things that can't be proven and I'm not a believer in Bigfoot. But how fun would it be to see Bigfoot in a pair of big, whapping clown shoes? Pretty dang fun, I reckon.

Some people say that not believing in things that cannot be proven takes the mystery out of life. But I think there is more mystery and wonder in the actual scientific nature of the universe than I could ever hold in my nano-noggin, so I don't feel the need to believe in magic, monsters, fairies, "signs", wizards, angels, gods, devils, spirits, or the like. It just doesn't interest me. If it interests you, go for it. Whatever works.

Tell your friends about tomorrow's contest, it's more fun the more people that play. Look how happy these previous winners are.

Contest Thursday, Ham Today


Bizarro is brought to you today by Hockey Moms.

I've never thought of myself as much of a caricaturist, but the pig character does look an awful lot like Steve Schirripa as his character, Bobby 'Bacala' Baccalieri on The Sopranos, who, more than likely, loves his prosciutto. I don't blame him, when I was still eating animals, I loved prosciutto, too. In fact, my parents used to run an Italian deli and sold some of the most delicious home recipes. Yum. As most of my readers know, I don't eat that way anymore.

I mostly did this cartoon because I thought the name Tony "Chest Pain" Proscuitto was funny.

I think I'll do another contest this week, for those of you who have been asking for it. Look for it on Thursday at 7pm NYC time. Here's a link to a past contest so you'll know what this is about if you're new to the game. Same basic rules and prizes.

Until tomorrow, be wonderful in your own little wonderland.

How Naked Was He?











(To make the cartoon really bigger, click on the Whippoorwill's wattle.)

Bizarro is brought to you today by Citizens Against Public Nudity.

This was a fun cartoon to draw with all its little bird people. I like to draw birds and some of my favorites are featured in the header panel for this cartoon, shown below. Some papers use these panels, some use thinner ones like this or this, some use none, depends on how comics section is laid out.

Some of the birds at left are tattooed on my right forearm, as a matter of fact. Looky here.

I got a few emails last week from people who didn't understand this cartoon. The joke hinges on the expression, "naked as a Jaybird." I'm not sure if people who didn't get the joke just didn't make the connection or had simply never heard the expression. Where I come from, people say this sort of thing all the time.

That's all for today, go forth this week and conquer your kingdom with sparkles.

25 Years of Scribbles



I've been pimping all week about the 25th anniversary of Bizarro, and this is it. A quarter of a century ago today, the first Bizarro ran in seven U.S. newspapers. Now it appears in a few hundred in the U.S., Canada, Norway, Sweden, India, Pakistan, Vietnam, some other places in Europe and a couple in South America, I think. The foreign markets are hard to keep track of.

There have been 13 books of Bizarro cartoons published since 1986, most of which are out of print now. Bizarro has won some awards from the National Cartoonists Society, The Humane Society, and some other people I can't recall the name of. I've been fortunate to travel quite a bit for business reasons, and met tons of amazing people.The crowning achievement of all that time, however, was when Bizarro and I were used as a clue on Jeopardy! a couple of years ago. That's when I felt like I'd actually permeated the national consciousness in some small way. I got a huge kick out of it and tried to contact them to see if I could buy a video tape of that episode, but no luck.

You may think that all of that adds up to fame and fortune, but you'd be wrong. I'm a little bit famous, in some areas, in some circles, and not at all rich. But I'm not complaining. I've made a nice living doing what I like on my own time, and I'd be an arrogant ass to not be abundantly grateful. My dad often tells this story on himself – when I was in the 9th grade he often told me that if I didn't stop drawing all over my school notebooks and study harder, I was never going to amount to anything. This happened to be one of the few times he was wrong about such things and man, am I glad.

Here's a little mini-retrospective of some of my work from the past. Yesterday I posted the first Bizarro cartoon that published on January 22, 1985, here are a few more from subsequent years.

In this comic from 1987, which I've come to call "Rednecks Tampering with Physics," I'd started to clean up my inking a bit. There isn't nearly as much scratchy, crosshatching as that which filled my first year's efforts. The joke is a little more sophisticated, too, and marks the first time I started getting into a groove that doesn't make me cringe when I look back on it. I still like this joke after all these years (although not so much the drawing,) and that's saying something. Early on, the majority of my gags were more pun-oriented, or slapstick. This one has an odd concept that I think still works. I later did a new illustration of this one in color for a calendar. Wish I could find it, it's somewhere around here.


Here is one from 1988. Though I switched to using a brush around '91 or so, I was still using a pen here. This one is an experiment with pretty dramatic perspective, something not often seen in newspaper comics then (or now, for that matter) and I'm continuing to clean up my look. You can see how a gag like this would not be legible if the inking were not clean. My kids were in school then, and there were plenty of little trophies around the house, which gave me the idea for this gag. Not brilliant or classic, but it's a fun visual gag.

This praying mantis joke from 1990 is a cartoon I'd completely forgotten about until I found it in an old book of mine while looking for cartoons for this post today. This is among the last cartoons I did before switching to a brush. I hadn't quite refined the caption box thing at the bottom, yet. This one is crooked and badly lettered. The underlining is distracting, too. I still like the weirdness of this gag, though. In those days, I had to fix things by cutting and pasting and using White Out, so things like crooked type didn't get fixed. Now I can fudge them on computer in a matter of seconds, and no one is the wiser.


I did cartoons only six days-a -week from 1985 to 1990, then started doing Sunday cartoons, too. Here is one of the earliest ones, which I still like. This was when I was coloring the old-fashioned way, marking up a zerox of the cartoon with hundreds of little CMYK (Cyan, Magenta, Yellow, Black) percentage numbers to indicate each color, then sending them to the company responsible for creating film for client newspapers. It was tedious, time consuming, and involved a huge amount of guesswork. I redid this gag years later after I was coloring my own work on computer. Don't remember when, though.

Lastly for today, a favorite cartoon of mine from 1994. By this time I had begun inking with a brush, had changed the way I letter bottom captions, but had not yet developed the current lettering style I use for balloons, which happened in '96. This is another one of those gags that would not work unless the drawing is clean and resolved. I could not have done this earlier in my career, without it looking like a complete mess. I am fortunate enough to have climbed the tiny spiral staircase inside the Statue of Liberty back before 9/11, when they closed it to tourists. The inside is hollow and looks pretty much like this except without organs. You can see the entire statue in negative, however ,which I found really fascinating. It would be even more amazing with organs, though.

Hope you enjoyed my anniversary retrospective. Abrams Books published a really nice retrospective of my various forays into the arts a couple years ago, which has this kind of stuff and lots more. It covers my cartoon career, fine art, commercial art, comedy show tours I've done and my personal life, all written by me in what I intended to be simultaneously humorous, informative, entertaining and inspirational. You can get a copy in various online places, or here, from me. Hurry, this one is out of print, too, and when the warehouse is empty, it'll be too late. : )

Make no mistake about it, you rock.

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